embarrassing himself and rubbed treasury folks the wrong way.” The Partner knew that this personality flaw overshadowed all the positive traits George possessed. People just simply could not handle the sharp elbows and intensity and it caused them to avoid him whenever possible.

It was clear in my first meeting with George that he was a very pragmatic person who placed a high value on efficiency and outcomes. These, he believed, trumped everything else when it came to serving the client. He had a low tolerance for people who were indirect and sought to avoid conflict, even when in his view, the best decision for the client and the firm was obvious

and straight forward. When that happened, George had an inability to hold back and a low interest in exploring the concerns his colleagues might have.

We learned through George’s personality and 360 assessments that he was very respected by the people he worked with day to day. In fact, his peers and staff scored him very high. It was leadership who felt that George was the proverbial “bull in a china shop.” What George and I discovered was that those with whom he worked day to day appreciated his style and ability to give clear direction. Likewise, his clients valued the authentic, no nonsense approach to solving their very complex technical problems. George was running into problems internally with Partners and certain legal advisors who viewed his approach as a risk.

George was not readily willing to change his approach because he felt he was right. And, in many respects he was right; however, his tone was so off-putting that these leaders discounted him. It was important for George to come to an understanding that this was his problem to solve, not the Partners or the legal staff. They may have misunderstood his approach and had a bad impression, but only George could change the situation. It took him a few months and we had many lengthy conversations where he would seek to justify his approach.

George began to realize that even when his business approach was right for the client his tone and need for hyper efficiency was repelling important colleagues, the people he needed to trust him and support him. He had a decision to make. Disregard the perceptions of these key leaders and not become a partner. Or, open his mind to understand that his black and white

approach was ineffective.

George began to listen more. He began to ask questions to gain insight into what his colleagues concerns were. He decided to think before he spoke and weigh the personal political cost of snapping at the person on the other end of the conference call. Within nine months George had transformed others’ perception of him. A few months later he was invited into the partnership.

Within a few minutes of interacting with Fred I came to appreciate his amazing character and personality. It would be hard not to like Fred with his gentle spirit, sharp mind and warm smile. However, there was a strain on the give and take in conversation. The easy flow of thought and interaction was not there. It was as if he was working too hard to say the right things and his

reactions sometimes didn’t match what was being said. Fred also had a few second delay in his ability to grasp the punch line. This caused him to laugh at jokes a few seconds after everyone else was done laughing.

Fred was motivated to learn and gain greater self-awareness, but it would not be easy for him to make this level of change in his personality. These types of issues are usually innate to the personality and less behavioral. We can change our behavior quickly, but personality adjustments can take years of intentional effort.

When Fred received the feedback from his 360 report, it was tough to take. He struggled to understand how others were describing him because it was a blind spot for him and he never realized that people viewed him this way. Fred and I spent quite a bit of time working through the feedback and helping him gain perspective. This required a lot of courage from Fred, but as his coach, I had to a strike a balance between letting him feel the full effects while assuring him he would be able to overcome it. We went to work with coaching on interpersonal skills, communication skills, reading assignments, social activities and role play on client interactions over happy hours and dinner. Things began to connect for Fred. He asked several of his colleagues to help him in real time and developed the ability to focus on others and less on his own self-consciousness. Fred’s transformation became evident to all and he made Partner the following year.